On the Other Side of Tomorrow

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Happy belated Merry Christmas. I hope it was fun, festive and all-out wonderful.

      Now that Christmas has come and gone (even though the 12 days of Christmas technically starts on Christmas day), it means New Years is just around the corner. Literally. New Years Eve is tomorrow. Last year I wrote THIS POST on January first *after* the big shimmering ball dropped. I just reread it and I have to stay, I was pretty darn impressed with my hopeful eloquence and encouraging sentiment. Unfortunately, I feel a lack of New Years enthusiasm this year.

      I have no grand plans for tomorrow night. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my family and giving my cat and dog a big kiss on the forehead when the 10, 9, 8....countdown finishes. But man, it makes things a bit difficult to get excited for the year 2014 when I'll probably be in bed fifteen minutes into the new year. But, I do not want to be a Debbie-downer. I do not want to wallow in my self-pity and loneliness which is only satiated by leftover Christmas cookies. I want to be as optimistic as I was at the start of this year, which is now almost over.

       Since Christmas, I have had THIS SONG stuck in my head: "Have yourself a merry little Christmas....next year all our troubles will be out of sight..." Next year. Out of sight. I know that the song refers to next Christmas, but, technically, next year is this week. So! Does that mean that by Wednesday morning all my troubles will be out of sight??? I have a bad feeling that the answer is "NO."

      As much as I love this song, I have to say, Judy Garland might be wrong in her philosophy. If I put on a smile today and put off my problems in hopes that they will be out of sight, I will never get anywhere. My troubles will not magically vanish with next year. It would be good to let my heart be light, but it cannot truly be until I work everything out as it comes to me; until I take every day's challenges and adventures for what they are and live each moment to the fullest. If right now I thought, "Well, this year might be lame, but NEXT December 30th will be great," my life would end up as a perfect graveyard of buried hopes (thanks to Anne of Green Gables for that lovely image).

      Last year I talked about Cinderella going about her daily routine after midnight. She sat in buckets of dirty water and dusty floors until the prince came and saved her. But maybe, just maybe, this year will be about throwing off the apron and going out to seek my own new life. I don't mean chasing after some guy, waving around a glass slipper in my hand. I mean chasing after what I want. What I dream. And then, hopefully next year all my troubles *will* be gone, because I'll have found myself and the resolve to make them go away.

      I hope, my dear readers, that in 2014, you take matters into your own hands. You make sure all your troubles will be out of sight by actively ensuring their disappearance. Be your own magic eraser. And if it helps, sing along with Judy Garland for some inspiration and a smile.

                                                                          Sincerely,
                                                                                   Me

My Grownup Christmas List

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      It's all over now. The semester is finished. I presented my thesis. I took my exams. I drank in celebration. I graduated.

      Now, I am in New Jersey aka my new home for an indefinite amount of time. I've only been here three days and it has snowed twice -today included. Right now I am sitting at my trusty desk and looking out of the bay window. It is snowing pretty hard and the plowman just cannot seem to keep up with it all. Coming from North Carolina where a week and one half ago it was 77 degrees, I am amazed at how much it is snowing and at how *freaking* cold it is here in Jers. But I am here now, and I couldn't be more thrilled at the potential of a white Christmas.

      I've mentioned before how stoked I am to be able to relax and sleep and read whatever I want when I am home. Well, now I am home, and I don't know what to do with myself. I spent all day Sunday rearranging my books to exactly my liking and now they are all out and displayed in front of me -it's a bit overwhelming.

      I still want nothing more than to lounge around all day and just read read read but what about being a grownup? What about job searching and life planning and getting on my feet? What about Christmas shopping for my family and spending quality time with those who will be home? I've got my whole life ahead of me, and yet sometimes it seems like there is never enough time or energy. The Christmas season is supposed to be about patience and love and giving, but what about the time I need to give to myself? Is that considered part of the Deck-the-Halls holiday spirit? Jesus was born in a stable, and I'm worried about where I'm going to be living in the next few months. Is this acceptable during this time of year? It's part of being an adult -but is it part of Christmas?

      Sometimes I feel like Cindy Lou Who from How the Grinch Stole Christmas and I find myself wondering -where are you Christmas? We've got the snow, the tree, the eggnog and the nativity all set and ready to go. But how do credit card bills, insurance payments, and rent play into it all? How can you reconcile the Christmas spirit with the grownup reality?

      I have no answers for all this because clearly I wouldn't be asking them if I did. All I can do for the moment, I guess, is curl under the heating blanket and take it one step at a time. I mean, it is prettttty icy outside. If I take it too fast, I might slip and fall flat on my ass bottom.

                                                                          Sincerely,
                                                                                  Me

Gobble It Up

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Yesterday I hopped on an airplane and flew to Huntsville, AL where I am spending the Thanksgiving holiday with my lovely extended family. I was oh-so *thankful* to fly out yesterday since, from what I have heard, flying out today was kukulafrandandolly (aka crazy). Yesterday was a bit hectic too, and if you live on the east-coast, you know why. The wind was blustering, the rain was torrential-ing, and the coldness was freezing.

      When I left Charlotte Intl Airport, I thought we were in for a bumpy ride. The pilot predicted it, and anyone with eyes could see that we were headed up into the dark masses of storm. The first ten-fifteen minutes of the flight was rocky for sure with babies wailing and flight attendant's pacing. *Thankfully,* it was a pretty empty flight so I had no one sitting in front of me nor directly next to me. I got pretty comfortable and since take-off is my favorite part of flying, I sat back and tried to enjoy it all. I love the feeling when the wheels break from the runway and your stomach lifts up with the plane. But something pretty incredible happened mid-flight. And here are my sappy words to tell ya'll about it:

      When we dashed through the atmosphere and burst through the clouds, the sun was shining. That's right. The sun. I hadn't seen it all day, for the darkness consumed the sky since morning. But when we emerged, the sun made the clouds glow. We were no longer in the gray shadow and turbulent haze. No, now we were above it all and looking down on the vast spans of rolling thunder clouds. Looking out the window, I saw something spectacular. From this view, it felt like we were flying over snowy mountains speckled only by shadow. Above us the blue atmosphere bled into a rainbow which ended in violet waves and white foam. The horizon gave one last kiss as we started to descend, and the glimmer of hopeful sunshine diminished as we dove back into the gray. The last gap of orange began to close until there was nothing but a thin, straight line splitting the black above with the gray below. With a blink of an eye, it was gone; and we continued the rocky descent back into the storm. But for those twenty minutes, I am so *thankful*. It brought peace onto the flight and peace into my heart as I prepared to spend some quality time with family.

      I know it might be a bit ridiculous to talk about my hour and a half flight for a Thanksgiving post, but I wanted to convey the point that this time of year, you have to be thankful for all the little things in life as well. The beautiful sky was my little gift, and I don't feel any less blessed for that than I am for everything else in life.

      So for tomorrow on Thanksgiving, don't just gobble up the turkey, but gobble up all the little moments that make life precious.

                                                                    Sincerely,
                                                                              Me

Aspiring To...

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      I have exactly one month until I will be graduated from college and until I will be home. What?!?! Crazy, right? My last exam in on December 13th, which means that on December 14th, I will be at home, in bed, and probably taking a nap right about now. With time whizzing by, I've really had to think about what I will be doing with my time come mid-December. I've got a few plans up my sleeves -you all will probably be the last to know what they are -but I can tell you some plans.

      As I mentioned in this post, I am really excited to read all the books that have been piling up over the last few months. I started to make a list of particular books which I will want to read first out of the many. Here are some of the *must reads* on my daily-growing list:

• Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
• Slaughterhouse Five - Kurt Vonnegut
• Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoevsky (and basically everything Dostoevsky)
• Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
• Bobcat - Rebecca Lee
• The Catcher in the Rye - J.D. Salinger
• Doctor Zhivago - Boris Pasternak

      Quite a list, I know, but I have very legitimate reasons for each and every one. Like I said, the list is forever changing and growing and I am very open to suggestions. Please, if you have any suggestions, feel free to comment. In case ya'll haven't picked up on it  yet, I am a bit of a reading freak and I could spend all day every day doing that -the one thing I know for sure I love and am good at.
                                                                  
                                                                         Sincerely,
                                                                                  Me

Octobre

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

October

• Color- As per the usual month/color combination, this month the color is orange. Now, I know what you are thinking; Duh she picked orange because October is the month of Halloween. Duh she picked it because the leaves are starting to turn orange. Duh. Duh. Duh. Well all those things are true, I admit. But see, I have this jacket...The color is a burnt yellowish/orangish/pumpkin spicish. When you think of fall, you think of a color, right? Well this jacket is the epitome of that color. Yesterday I wore it with a white oxford and blue skinnies and I just felt SO fetch fall. People even told me that I looked like fall. This color makes me feel like I'm bathing in pumpkin pie and floating among the trees. Weird imagery, but ya'll get the point.
• Book- To keep myself from yet *another* rant about how I have no time to read any of the things I want to, I'll switch it up. Last October I wrote THIS POST about all the wonderful Octoberish things -including books. While I still think those books are all prime for October reading, I would also like to recommend Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier. I recently recommended this book to a dear friend of mine for fall reading. It contains romance, mystery, and most importantly, the pivotal gothic elements required for the best fire-side reading. So if you are looking for something good, consider picking it up. Warning: The paperback edition of this book DOES look like a romance novel. Please do not be deterred by its appearance.
• Song- One of the most soulful women in the world must be Billie Holiday. She sings, you/me/everyone feels something. Her version of I'll Be Seeing You is one that gets me every time. Listen to it. Need I say more?

I don't really have a specialty of the month, but I hope you all are having special Octobers.

 

                                                                         Sincerely,

                                                                                Me

Crunchity Crunch

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Now that it officially feels like fall, I figure I would give you all a little treat. I found this gem among some old, dusty papers from my high school youth of writing ambition. Here it is, and I hope you get a little kick out of it. =)

-----------

Crunch the leaves. They are falling just to fulfill their service to be crunched. What other reason does the tapestry of color have other than to glide from gravity to the earth? What other purpose do leaves have other than filling ears with the perfectly pitched crackle underneath brown leather boots? Yellow. Red. Brown. Orange. Nature’s perfection in the loftiest form. Lofty even when piled on the dirt. The most precious past time of every single autumn is walking along a lane lined with these majestic trees which serve as trellises to everything right in the world. Breathe in the crisp air. Are you breathing? Can’t you almost taste the leaves? As you walk, look for the crunchiest leaves. Not all of them will fill the musical void, but when they do, one cannot help but smile. Be like a child and make a game of it. Seek out the crunchers and only step on those. Stretch your legs far and wide if necessary. Skip, hop, and leap.  But most importantly, crunch away.

Crunch the time. With the gusts of winds and tropical downpours, the leaves aren’t promised to last long. The golden glow will fade as the daylight turns dusk earlier and earlier.  Daylight savings is approaching. The hours to relish in the iridescent treetops will die out too soon for anyone’s liking.  Spend the remaining time outside as much as possible. Stand with turned up necks. Blink only when your eyes can’t stand the breeze. Breathe deeply. Just do it. You may feel like a tree hugging fool, but you won’t regret it. You cannot possibly imagine the inner peace which will encompass your entire being, just by looking at the leaves. Since time moves faster than conceivably possible, crunch it into precious and memorable moments.  Take pictures, write a poem, and hold onto one for nostalgia. But crunch the time into only positive experiences.

Crunch the food. In those moments when the weather is cruel and forbidding, and you are forced to remain indoors in front of a roasting fire, wearing flannels and watching TCM Classics, do a little baking. The picture I painted for you isn’t a bad one by any means.  In truth, it sounds rather perfect. So spend some time in the kitchen.  Even if you don’t have Martha Stuart style or Emeril skill, turn up some Bronze Radio Return and set the oven to 450. The number of recipes for cakes, breads, cookies and muffins is unequivocal. Think about the number of yummy ingredients this weather permits. Walnuts, chestnuts, almonds, hazelnuts, pecans, and more. They add texture to your meals and to your life. It may not seem like it, but it does. After slaving over your pristine Kitchen Aid mixer for hours, there is nothing more satisfying than sitting in wool socks, sipping hot tea and salivating over your fresh out of the over baked goods. A pinch of sugar, spice, and everything crunchy is all it takes.

Crunch away my fellow autumnal experiencers. Crunch away.

                                                                Sincerely,

                                                                         Me

Septiembre

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

September

• Color- This is not a particularly light and fluffy color, but I have been wearing a lot of black lately. It might be to reflect my mood, or it might be because it is slimming, but black has definitely been the color this month. Don't get me wrong, I have not been Eeyor-ing it up lately, I have just been rather stressed, as I mentioned last post. Black also goes with most everything, so on mornings when I am too tired to think of anything else, I go for the standard.
• Book- Ha Ha Ha...that is a funny concept...as if I have time to read a book! But there is one thing... my secondary thesis advisor gave me a mini book called From St. Isaac The Syrian to Dostoevsky. As my Dostoevsky obsession comes from her, she thought it fit to bestow this gem into my care for a while as I work on my thesis. I have not opened it up yet but it is there waiting for when I am truly in the depths of thesis despair and need to be reminded why in hell on earth I picked this topic. Lately, Dostoevsky and I have been having some domestic disputes and I'm worried it will turn into an all out war. So this point stands ready, waiting for the right moment to intervene before chaos ensues.
• Song- Easily and unquestionably and absolutely the song this month (and probably for the rest of the semester) is "Wake Me Up" by Avicii. I first heard this song over the summer, before everyone else did of course, and it spoke to my soul. I listened to it more and more and realized that this song literally tells my life story as it currently stands as a senior in college. It is the primordial explanation for all the feelings I feel, and simultaneously, it is a great song to just get up and dance to. When I am stressed, I listen to this song. When I am happy and motivated, I listen to this song. Here it is, and I hope you all enjoy it as much as I do: Wake Me UP.

                                                                      Sincerely and Cordially,
                                                                                      Me

PS- I wish that I could stay forever this young...

The Crazies

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      It has almost been two months since my last post. TWO months. Usually when I go a long time without writing I apologize to you all, my readers. But this time, I'm not going to say anything other than this: Life is crazy and this summer was crazy and so far, this semester at school is crazy. Blogging has been my last priority, and so, I just didn't do it. Now to move on.

      I have been in school for over a month now. One month done, less than three to go. In less than three months I am going to be done my college career. Forever. Let's think about this for a minute because it's the only thing I've been thinking about. I literally cannot comprehend the thought of graduating college so soon. Yes, it was my choice to graduate early, but the thought is still foreign to me. Most days, I still feel like a twelve year old. Not a twelve year old stuck in a twenty-one year olds body. Nono. Just twelve. And twelve year olds have no business graduating college. None.At.All.

      The hard thing is (among a zillion other things), everyone keeps asking what I am going to when I finish. Where are you going to go? What are you going to do? Are you going to work? Grad school? Travel? My answer these days has been a mere "uhhh...HAHA....uhhhh...I'll let you know when I know?"  I wish I knew. I really, really, really, really wish I knew. But I don't. And I am having a hard time accepting the reality of the situation at hand.

      I'll be honest, I do have ONE plan in mind. I am so freaking excited to read whatever the heck I want to. As I've mentioned multiple times before, I am working on my senior thesis this semester. I've been working on it all summer and will be for the next three months. Don't get me wrong, I love my topic and all, but I am SO SICK of reading scholarly articles and journals and annotating every stinking thing I read. I am an English major because I like to READ. READDDD. Not annotate. Not analyze. I like the stories, not the metaphors. I don't want to read between the lines, I want to enjoy the lines I'm reading.

      So reader, you want to know what I'm going to do when I graduate? I am going to read all the books on my shelves that I have not had time to read as an English major. I am going to re-read all of my favorite books. And you know what? I am going to enjoy every second of it. I cannot wait. It is going to be so great reading for fun again and not having to worry about being quizzed or picking out quotes from it to write a 15 page paper. It is going to be a dream come true.

                                                       Sincerely,
                                                               Me

JueLie

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

July

• Color- Believe it or not, there IS such a thing as "summer gray". Normally, when people think of the color gray, they think "Winter," "Cold," "Sad," "Fog and/or Rain," etc. etc. So in the summer time, the color gray does become sad....because no one bothers to pay it any mind. But this summer, I have found myself wearing Summer Gray at least once a week. I have the perfect little Anthropologie light gray V-neck t-shirt and it is a staple in my closet. The gray is so light it is almost white and it goes perfectly with basically everything, including white. Now, when I think of gray, I do not think of cold sadness; I think of all the warm sunny days where I could walk around and change the color of winter.
• Book- I have come to realize how hard it is to pick a Book of the Month. When I have the time for "fun reading," the picking isn't so bad because I usually just talk about what I am enjoying that month. But this month, I don't really have a book because I've been spending all my reading time doing research. And packing. My family is moving in just a few weeks and that means the worst thing possible- my books have to go into boxes to be put in storage for a few weeks. I know. Tragic. But I have to admit, pulling them off the shelves and reinvestigating them has been pretty enjoyable. It's not that I *forgot* I own certain books but sometimes it is easy to forget how precious they were to you upon first read. So rather than me telling you all what book I think is good this month, I will tell you to go to your own shelves and rediscover the old goodies collecting dust from your youth. Give Little House on the Prairie a good stroll down memory lane, or better yet, bask in the White Way of Light with Anne of Green Gables just one more time.
• Song- One song that I have really liked since around November is "Anything Could Happen" by Ellie Goulding. It always puts me in a good mood and I love turning the volume up up and away whenever it comes on my Pandora or Spotify stations. Here it is for your enjoyment: Anything Could Happen

 

So in case nobody noticed, I changed the layout and design of my blog. It is much simpler and plain, but I think it is a little bit of fresh air. It doesn't feel so dark to me and although I am personally still getting used to it, I hope you all like it! If not, a reversal is totally do-able and even though I say all the time that I blog for me, I secretly like to blog for my readers too =)

 

 

Fresh

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      It is hot. I cannot think of a clever or sassy way to put it otherwise since my brain is melting faster than the icecaps. As the temperatures continue to rise (who knew that was even possible at this point???), I have spent an abundance of time inside. But I do have to suck it up and brace the heat a few times throughout the day to walk the dog, get the mail, walk to my car, etc. On each of these unfortunate occasions I always feel immediately miserable. Not in the "my life is horrible and no one likes me" way, but in the "Ew, I feel disgusting and need to go inside and shower for the fifth time today" way. I'm not a big fan of smelling like "outside" nor am I a fan of sweating. Really though, is anyone?

      As these refreshing thoughts are the only ones I can muster up right now, I couldn't help but apply freshening up to other aspects of my life. My family is moving very soon to a completely different state. Whaaat?!? Yea. It's happening. With the whole moving process comes the whole packing process which inevitably leads to the throwing out process. We have done so much de-cluttering and compromising and evaluating of what we own, what we want to keep, what we want to donate and much more. And as much as I love everything and hate to throw things out, the whole ordeal is actually a bit invigorating. I find that I have a little more closet space (Yay!) and a little more drawer space.

      So there's that. Now what? What other refreshing can I bring to life? "Hmmm," I thought. "Maybe I can refresh my blog a bit..." So that is what I am presently contemplating. Being on the Blogosphere means staying attune to other blogs in the world and my, oh my, are there a lot. Of course I don't want to go all commando on my readers and strip away everything but the words, but I think it is time for a slightly more refreshing look.

      I am finding that the background image, though fitting for my overall intended tone,  becomes more and more obnoxious and distracting. Yet, I don't really have any pictures in my blog posts; so if I take away the large picture, there might be nothing left but too many words upon words. And no one wants to look at that. Regardless of what I end up changing, I think the time has arrived for SOME change of scenery. What do you think?

      As I ponder this impending change, my dear readers, please try and stay cool and fresh in this suffocating heat. Drink lots of water, find some shade, and apply Dove's GO FRESH deodorant as needed =)

                                                                       Sincerely,
                                                                              Me

Tiff

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      When Audrey Hepburn had a Down Day, she went to Tiffany's. Or at least her character went to Tiffany's. Better yet, her character ate BREAKFAST at Tiffany's. It made her feel better about life, love and the general pursuit of happiness. Though it never had such a lasting effect as, say, looking for Cat in the pouring rain with a hot man by her side, eating her scone and drinking her coffee in front of the glimmering windows on the New York street corner always seemed to do the trick for a day in desperation.

      I have a place like that. I have two places, actually. Anthropologie would be the first. Barnes & Noble, the second. I don't know what it is about these places that automatically lifts my spirits upon stepping through their air-conditioned thresholds. It is something in the air, NO, something in the smell. The atmosphere. The people. The clothes. The books. The general lifestyle I wish I lived my life by. I could spend a lifetime in Anthropologie and I could spend even longer in Barnes & Noble.

      It would be schaweeeet if when I get married I could register at Anthropologie. I'm pretty sure that isn't a "thing" yet, but I'm hoping that maybe if I get the idea of an AnthroRegistery enough street credit, maybe, just maybe, someone with corporate authority will hear my voice.  In the mean time, I will just continue to strive to fill my closet accordingly.

      Don't get me wrong though. One does not need to shop at their store of comfort in order to feel alleviated from the burdens of life. I mean seriously, I am a poor college student. If I wanted to buy anything on my own at Anthro I would have to limit myself to a piece of thread in the SALE section. I am not ashamed though because if I could eat breakfast everyday in front of their handcrafted window designs, I would.

      I know I haven't said anything yet about the glorious relief achieved at Barnes & Noble yet, but fear not, for hear it is.....

....And then some....

Did you like my use of my Pinteresting just then?

      I guess what I am trying to say is this: It is prime and pertinent to have *at least* one place where you can go and smell and stand and look around you to feel a little better. If it is the gym, then I hope you are doing a little more than just smelling and standing around. If it is a cake shop, maybe just smelling and standing is all you should be doing. Be what it may, it helps, even if only for a little. It may sound too "first world problem-y" or too materialistic but I think there really is something to being surrounded by your passions.

      Sure, maybe I should go smell the inside of a Church more often. And who knows, maybe that will be number three on the list. But for now, my Cat is safe and sound and snuggled up on the couch. Life is good and, today, I went into Barnes & Noble and smelled.

                                                            Sincerely,
                                                                      Me

 

Juniper

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

June

• Color- Since I live near Annapolis, I think it is appropriate to declare the color for this most fantastic month is NAVY. I like navy and white, navy and yellow, navy and pink. I like looking at the Navy men in their crisp uniforms. Navy is one of those classic colors. It is a staple for a lot of weddings and for a lot of home décor. It is one of those prime summer colors, for it's crispness looks elegant and casual all at once.
• Book- Although I am currently reading "East of Eden" for my thesis, I want to kind of switch gears and not do the one I am reading nightly. Instead, the book this month is officially "Love Letters of Great Men." It is a compilation of, well, love letters written by some of the great men to their beloveds. The list includes Mark Twain, Beethoven, Henry VIII, and Oscar Wilde. It is one of those books that warms your heart and helps the sentiments rise and when you receive it as a gift, it makes the sentiment even that much higher =)
• Song- In sticking with the deviation, I think this months song shouldn't really be a song....but rather, a noise. I think June is the perfect month for thunder. Obviously there is a thunder storm almost every single afternoon in June, but nothing beats the sound of rolling thunder in the late afternoon of a summer day. Even if there is no cooling rain or flashing lightning, the sound of the thunder always makes me stop and listen and look outside in anticipation for a potential storm.

Specialty of the Month- Birthdays- Yesterday was my twenty-first birthday. I can honestly and whole-heartedly tell you that I have never had any alcohol before yesterday, and I think I had enough to last me a while. Needless to say, I am spending my day today laying very low and just taking it easy.  So for all those who like to rage, I would just like to say, make sure you have enchanting friends who can take care of you in times of desperation. Because I had a few, and it made all the difference in the world.

 

 

                                                                     Sincerely,

                                                                               Me

 

P.S. Juniper plants actually smell pretty bad...kind of like cat pee. Yet somehow, I think of Junipers when I think of the month June. Probably because they sound the same...

A Little Listless

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Right now I am reading John Steinbeck's novel East of Eden.  I decided to change my thesis topic a few weeks ago which meant abandoning Don Quixote for Steinbeck; but have no fear, I have maintained Dostoevsky in the overall scheme of things. Anywho...I read East of Eden my junior year of high school, making this the second that I've read the book. Since I have to actually pay attention this go-round, I am noticing quotes that are rather profound and applicable to my current state of being, such as this one:

                 "Time interval is a strange and contradictory matter in the mind. It would be reasonable to suppose that a routine time or an eventless time would seem interminable. It should be so, but it is not. It is the dull eventless times that have no duration whatever. A time splashed with interest, wounded with tragedy, crevassed with joy-- that's the time that seems long in the memory. And this is right when you think about it. Eventlessness has no posts to drape duration on. From nothing to nothing is no time at all."

      So obviously it is summer. Duh, I mean just look at a calendar, and even though the technical first day of summer isn't until the 21st, schools are out and swimming pools are open and the beach traffic officially is the sole cause of global warming. But what does it mean to be on summer vacation? Adults with actual full-time jobs don't get three months off of work. There is such a thing as "summer school" so the classrooms aren't all collecting dust. The mailman AND the garbage man still have to roam the toasty pavement. And don't forget all those people who work in retail, *cough, cough*, who still have to trudge into their stores and/or local offices to serve the general population of teeny-boppers who just like omg loooooove to walk around the mall and mess up everything in sight only to buy like this totally hottt pair of earrings...... sorry. CLEARLY I harbor a deep seeded grudge against those people when I am the one who has to be nice and friendly when they walk in.

      So again, I ask- What is "summer vacation"? I think for a lot of people, summer IS that eventlessness. Ask anyone how their summer has been thus far and I bet nine out of ten people would respond "It's too fast," or "I can't believe June is almost over," or my favorite "We need to start keeping an eye out for those back-to-school sales". For me, I Literally Cannot Believe June is almost over. I got out of school on May 1st this year. MAY FIRST. That means that I have had over a month and a half of vacation so far, and that is mind boggling.

      I think Steinbeck has really hit something with his above quotation. When my boyfriend booked his trip to come visit me earlier this month, every.single.day between booking and arriving dragged on like a freaking snail. And then it was like I was stuck in a time warp, because NOW I can't believe next week I am leaving for Charlotte to celebrate my birthday. Between boyfriend and birthday I have been stuck in a daily rut of wakeup, drink some tea, eat some Captain Crunch, shower, eat lunch, read read read read research reseach, watch TV, nap, dinner, readdddddd, TV, journal, bed. Wake up and do it all again. And you know what? My time is flying faster than a jet plane, or Superman. BUT, now that I am leaving in a week, the time warp has snapped open and dumped me back into Snailville.

      Sure, occasionally I do something daring like go to the movies or, shockingly, work. But when there is nothing life changing or even entertaining, it's like the days slip through my fingers and I find myself every night grasping for something that has already come and passed. People always say "Live each day like it is your last." But how do you do that when, truly, there isn't enough hours in a day, days in a week, weeks in a month, etc.etc.? If I did something exciting and adventurous and different every single day, I wouldn't have the time or energy to fulfill my daily thesis requirements. So when your days comprise of nothing to nothing, how do you reconcile that with the societal expectations to have the Best Summer EVER? I am bored most of the time, but what am I supposed to do to fix that?

      If someone out there in the grand cosmos, or even in the tri-state area has the answer, I would be much obliged to be let in on the secret.

                                                                  Sincerely,
                                                                          Me

Allegory of the Cave

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      I caved. I caved big time. Usually I pride myself on not conforming to major trends...at least not conforming when it is popular to do so. I didn't get a Facebook until February of my senior year of high school. I didn't get an ipod until the summer before my freshman year of *college*. When I went to Israel in the fall of my senior year of high school, I took a CD player and a handful of CDs. Old school. I still don't have a Twitter and my phone is a dinosaur from the stone age. That's right folks, I can't snapchat you even if I wanted. But on Thursday night, my holding out took a nose dive into the ground when I got a Pinterest.

      This may come as a shocker and I apologize for any sudden heart palpitations, but up until Thursday, I never wanted a Pinterest. Everyone insisted that I get one because apparently, I seem like just the kind of person who would have one. I always secretly reveled in the knowledge that "Ha. I am a like a neo-hipster because I haven't caved even after it is cool." Now, that may make me nothing more than a freak with a weird sense of personal achievement, but I have been darn proud of myself for holding out this long. I guess I can not longer claim one small step for man, one giant leap for Megan-kind, can I?

      I really have nothing more to say on the matter other than, what would Plato say? He claims that the people in the cave are stupid and unenlightened and need to be brought into the light of the sun in order to know basically everything. So, does joining the realm of Pinterest mean I have stepped into the light? Does the expression "This, that, or the other CAVED" always insinuate something negative? Is conformity more appropriate to crawling back into the dark cave on my hands and knees and begging to stay? Or, is conforming to the general consensus part of what Plato considers enlightenment? The biggest question is probably this: Would Plato even give a flying banana pancake about my joining Pinterest? Probably not, and therefore, I will leave it at that.


                                                                     Sincerely, 
                                                                              Me

May I?

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

May

• Color- I'm not sure if this counts as a "color," but this month I have to promote White. As boring as it might seem, white makes everything else pop. If you do your utmost best to imagine walking through a vast garden amongst plumes of white flowers, then it does not seem so lame does it? It would make the greens greener and the yellows yellower. And unless you are the Queen of Hearts from Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and hell-bent on painting every single white flower red, you'll agree with me that it is a sight to be revered. And I mean, let's be real. White jeans/shorts/skirts in the summa'time = prime outfit choice. It's crisp and fresh and a *LOT* cooler in the hot sunshine.
• Book- This particular category is a bit difficult this month. Usually I have no issue divulging my dirty little avid-reader secrets, but I'm a bit dried up this month. Some of you may know that I am on schedule to graduate early aka in December. Because I am graduating early, I have to spend my summer days doing research for my thesis. The normal procedure for English majors is research in the fall, writing in the spring; but since I need to write in the fall, I need to research this summer. I've already started and am currently working through Mikhail Bakhtin's essay Author and Hero in Aesthetic Activity. It's a doozy to say the least but I need to get through it before I start on the real meat of my thesis- Don Quixote.
• Song- This one is a bit tough this month too...But I think I'll stick with the standard pop song from the radio. Cliché and absolutely non-hipster of me but I'm opting to keep it simple this month. Since about October I've really liked the song "Just Give Me a Reason" but P!nk and Nate Reuss (the super talented lead singer of FUN). I guess I can be a hipster for .5 seconds since I've been playing that song since the fall and it's just become a major hit in the last month or so. But I really DO like that song and keep it on the radio every time it comes on, which is a bunch.

Specialty of the Month: Drink- I am a tea person. I don't drink coffee. I drink tea, all the time. A few times a day. It teeters on the verge of an addiction. My favorite is the classic Earl Grey. I love me some Earl. If someone asks me what kind of tea I want, I am predictable and will almost always answer "Earl Grey, please." But I also appreciate trying new teas. I have an awesome blossoming peach tea from Teavana and a delicious apple&mango combo from Teavana as well. And for Christmas my mom stuffed my stocking with a box of Prince Vladmir aka the Russian version of Earl Grey. It is prime, and though I may have been preemptively biased since it's Russian, I still really like it. Tea makes me feel all sophisticated too. I cannot quite put my finger on why, but sipping on a nice cup of tea just seems to warm me, literally AND figuratively.

 

 

                                                                           Sincerely,

                                                                                    Me

 

 

 



Rain

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Well, I missed April's month of "stuff." Too bad. I was swamped with final papers and exams and spending time with all of the lovely people who will be graduating in a few days and El Blogge went on the back burner. But now I'm back in action for the summer and ready to keep a steady schedule...or at least I hope to keep a steady schedule.

      Even though I am home for the summer, it doesn't feel like it. For starters, my school always lets out before everyone else. I'm not complaining; I mean, it's great to have a long summer vacation. But unfortunately, most other people aren't out yet which means I have no one to hang out with. Cry me a river, right?

      For the most part though, it doesn't feel like summer because of the weather. The majority of people think that Global Warming makes the temperature warmer on a day-to-day basis. Well people who think that, you are wrong. See, Global Warming DOES make the weather warmer....in the North Pole. Then, all the ice caps melt. You know all those cheesy commercials about saving the polar bears? That is for reals. The ice is melting and alllllll that precious fresh water makes its way down south to the normal oceans. The massive amounts of fresh water interferes with the normal amounts of things in the ocean. The currents get screwed up and low and behold, the jet stream gets completely thrown out of whack. And how is our weather determined? By that very same jet stream (among a whole bunch of other things). Therefore, the water is colder and the temperatures get colder.

      It is May seventh. The temperature outside? Sixty-Two and RAINING. There has been so many clouds, so much rain, so much ickyness that it makes me want to just run away and live on a tropical island where there is no humidity. I know...I should just keep dreaming.

      Weather like this is only good for a few things. 1). Snuggle up and watch a good movie. Rom-Com, Classic, Mystery. It doesn't really matter as long as it is a movie that you enjoy. 2). Snuggle up and read a good book. For me that means Beautiful Creatures. Don't judge. It's pretty good and it is a nice brain-break after finals and before I start thesis work. Rainy-day books make me think of Wuthering Heights  or  Northanger Abbey or something a little lighter like Twilight or Harry Potter. 3). Snuggle up and take a nap. 4). Snuggle up and do some arts & crafts. 5). Basically, snuggle up and do anything that doesn't require too much exertion nor going outside.

      On days like this, my dearest readers, remember Winnie the Pooh. That's right. Winnie the Pooh:
                        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0i7JU9SijE
                                    ^^^Watch it and SMILE ^^^

                                                                         Sincerely,
                                                                                Me

Oops...

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Basically a failure, I am. I have not blogged in so unbelievably long and I give my sincerest apologies. Mostly I apologize to myself because I have just been a lazy little child who cannot take five seconds out of her day to write a few words here and there. I know it is my own blog so it is my prerogative to write what I want, when I want. But I feel as if I have abandoned my blog lately to the side of a dusty dirt road to be eaten by rabid hyenas.

      Granted, I have been pretty busy lately. There are only two, TWO weeks of school left. Insanity has officially ensued. My reading list has reached astronomical numbers because it appears that I own all the stock in procrastination. Naturally that means I have not had any time for pleasure reading over the past few weeks...sad face. And to top it all off, the foliage on campus has exploded into a beautiful wonderland of white and pink and green and fragrance that tingles the inside of your nose and causes euphoria to spread down to your toes.

      For some reason this time of year always reminds me of springtime from high school. Not last year, not my freshman year of college, but high school. Sounds a bit odd, but if you don't think I am odd at this point than you really must not get me at all.

      In my first year of high school, we read Jane Eyre in the spring. It was the first time I read it and I distinctly remember one class period where we sat outside in the gardens and had a tea party and discussed the novel...(I went to an all-girls high school so doing something so feminine was encouraged).  My sophomore year we read A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court by Mark Twain. Most of my peers hated it but I thought it was hysterical. I really wore down my paperback copy and devoured it and became THAT kid in the classroom that asks and answers all the questions. Slightly embarrassing at the time but I was just starting to begin the process of embracing my nerdiness. To be frank, I can't quite remember anything significant from junior year. We read a lot of American lit and we all know how I feel about that...I know we definitely read Billy Budd by Melville and I definitely remember hating it....but the rest is a blur of indifference. Senior year was the best though. That was the year where we really embarked on the ship of high literature. That was the year of Anna Karenina (Tolstoy), Tess of the D'Urbervilles (Thomas Hardy), Doll House (Ibsen), The Stranger (Albert Camus), and The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini)  among a few others. We spent most of the spring on The Kite Runner and it was a very powerful experience.

      For those who have not read this book, I HIGHLY recommend it. It thoroughly changed the way I viewed the Middle East. I don't know if this is a good thing, but it awoke my inner adventurer and ignited a desire to go and visit. Admittedly though, I think I enjoyed Hesseini's second novel A Thousand Splendid Suns  better. The former's main character is male and the latter's female, making it more relatable (although relatable is a relative term when it comes to these books).

      That's really all I have to say for now. I will try to be more determined when it comes to keeping up with the Kardashians blog. Tootles for now, though, my little ducklings.

                                                             Sincerely,
                                                                      Me

Marchin On

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

March

• Color- I've got to admit that I've been sucked into the Spring 2013 fashion fads. Mint is the color of the season and mint is definitely the color of the month. I thought about emerald green, which would have been sentimental as the new Wizard of Oz movie came out this month AND we celebrated St. Patrick's Day not too long ago. But when I think about the green's I've been rocking around the campus trees, mint takes the reins. It may seem a bit much but I highly approve of these samples. What about you? Do you think mint green is just for mixing with chocolate chips in the freezer section of the grocery?
• Book- I am hooked. BIG time. Warning, though. What I am about to admit may be a bit scandy for some of your eyes which have been accustomed to my highly intellectual analysis of great literature. But sometimes, even the best fall down. Over the last seven days I have started and finished Stephenie Meyer's The Host. Yes, the author of Twilight.  Yes, the soon to be movie. Yes, it was freaking awesome. I loved it. All six-hundred-some pages. I read it into the wee hours of the night. I put off school work and basically normal human activity so I could sit and read it. The story line was consuming. If it weren't for the upcoming movie, I'm not sure I would have read it. But thank the Lord that it's coming to theaters because I so thoroughly enjoyed the book. A tad too much, maybe. But for all you skeptics (thanks to Twilight), believe me when I say this book was one thousand times better and worth the workout on your eyes.
• Song- The obsession with "Daylight" still lingers, but with the new OneRepublic song "If I Lose Myself," comes a new obsession. I have always been a OneRepublic fan. Since their early days, I've put their CDs on repeat. I have my favorite's and this new song of theirs is totes one of them. At first I thought it was a sellout. There was the techno-y interludes between verses and I was like "Psh. They are just trying to fit in." But as I listened to it more, I realized that they DO fit in while sticking to their signature stuff. I almost get as excited when this song comes on as I do with "Daylight." Almost.

Specialty of the Month: Clothes- Sounds a bit ridic, but roll with the punches. For my springtime wardrobe, I purchased a pare of nude colored flats from Aldo. They are leather and have a slight pointed toe. I pretty much wear them every single day. Sure, they were a bit of a financial OUCH, but I think I am for sure getting the use out of the money I dropped on these puppies. They go with everything, and I mean everything. Jeans, skirts, shorts, dresses, cropped pants. If you happen to be looking for a perfect pair of Spring foot covers, I vote nude flats. You won't regret it.


                                                                        Sincerely,
                                                                                 Me
P.S. Fun fact of the day? The title of my blog was inspired by a song. What song you may ask? "Marchin On" by the one and only OneRepublic. Mmhmm. See how I snuck that one in there?

Cirque

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      I have never gone to the circus. A lot of people haven't and I am one of those people. But that does not mean that I don't want to, because I do. At least once in my Pre-40 lifetime I would like to go to the circus. I've got twenty years of opportunities ahead of me and hopefully I will take one of them.

      My fascination with the circus doesn't originate from the short and stout days of young childhood. I never had any real interest in sitting in a large striped tent, watching weird looking twizzlers acrobats fly at eachother on ropes. Nor watching a large, mustached man poke at a lion with a chair. Nor having nightmares from the plastered faces of clowns. Nor throwing-up from too much popcorn/cottoncandy/soda on an otherwise empty stomach.

      Clearly I never thought too fondly of the circus...

      Two years ago, I read Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen. Though published in 2006, I didn't get my hands on it until 2011 when the movie version was coming out. I admit that I wanted to see the movie because Robet Pattinson...yes, Mr. Edward Cullen himself. I had NOT read the book up until then because I heard it was really strange and violent. And it is a little strange and a little violent. But let me just say, I loved this book. My mom mailed it to me when I was in school and I got in on a Friday. It was perfect because I had a little cold so all I wanted to do was stay in bed anyways. And stay in bed I did. For the next 24-36 hours, I basically didn't get out of bed. Only for the bathroom and only a few times for the microwave (a girl's gotta eat). I devoured the book page by page and at the end, I was sad because it was over. I lived in the circus with Jacob. I felt Rosie's every beating. I cringed over the Benzini Brother's treatment of their workers. This may put me higher on the certifiably insane list, but this shouldn't surprise anyone.  Interest in the circus? Definitely piqued.

      Over this past Christmas Break, I read another *fantastic* book. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern. I came across this book one afternoon in May when I was strollling through the New Fiction section of Barnes&Noble, obviously. The cover and title drew my attention and I picked it up for further investigation. The front-cover-flap plot summary and reviews deemed promising. The price? Not so much. Hardcover books are so much more expensive and it was too early for my summer job to really bring in the cash flow. So I put it back and found I, Iago instead (More about that another time, I'm sure).

      Since I already said I read it, the logical conclusion would be that at some point between May and December, I bought it.  I bought it in August. But with the new semester starting and school and the internship, I didn't have time until I came home. I'll start by saying this, the reviews on Goodreads.com far from favor this book. My opinion resides on the complete opposite end of the spectrum from these reviews. The Night Circus is probably one of the best books I've read, and I have read A LOT. It was dark and mysterious and magical and I had no idea what would come next. When I put it down, which I had to to go to work, I spent my brain-time thinking about it and picturing the words in my head. I know, just another reason why I should be locked up. But literally. A book starting with Oscar Wilde's quote has to be good: "A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishement is that he sees dawn before the rest of the world." I don't want to say too much about it or give it away at all, but just read it if you get the chance.

      I think I've strayed pretty far from my overall point about the circus. Basically, the long and short of it is this: Since reading these two books, I have a very keen interest in one day going to the circus. I think I'd prefer Cirque du Soleil or Barnum & Bailey or something popular along those lines. I want to push my way througn the striped tent and sit on a hard seat and fix my gaze on the ringmaster. Even if I hate it, even if I throwup the popcorn/cottoncandy/soda, even if the clowns give me nightmares, I want to go. I think with my imagination, I could feel the magic of the circus.

                                                                      Sincerely,
                                                                               Me

P.S. Even though I wasn't a big circus fan when I was little, I ate my weight in Animal Crackers. Not the ones you can buy in a tub from Walmart. No. I liked the ones you could find in Safeway in the little rectangle boxes with Barnum &Bailey circus animals on them. So I guess I supported the circus in my own little way. Heck, I guess I still do.

Freaky Friday

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Quite recently my Grandmother sent me an email with this article attached. She said she read it and thought of me, and when I read it, I thought of me too. I propose that you actually read the article to understand the rest of this blog. Plus, it's not that long and what's another few words to read? But, in case you are lazy, here is a quick synopsis:

      There are people in  the world who have fake bookshelves. Gasp. Blasphemy. The premise is that you can tell a lot about people by the books on their shelves; not the books they have laying around, but the ones hidden in the dusty corner and turned inside out and backwards on the shelf. So what does it say about people who have fake books or fake shelves? Basically it says they don't have the time, mental capacity or want to read the books they feel are a must. So they hire and buy spines of books to place in offices to give the illusion of being well-read because obviously, that's why books are important. Not. Even if they're not fake books, the article says that many people buy books with the sheer intention to display them, not read them.

      My initial reaction was horror. Horror! How can people buy fake books? Or even buy books that they don't even crack open, but just leave out on the front table for people to see and comment on. But then I got to thinking more on the article.  Low and behold, I came to the harsh realization that we all buy fake books, in some form or another.

      I am the first to admit that I am a memeber of the "books for show" club. Let me first clarify. I DO eventually READ the books that I buy. But, I organize my books according to which ones will be seen first when someone walks in my room. Some of my "sillier" books I even hide in my mom's room. I do the same in my dorm here at school. If I know there will be an unusual visitor, I may leave Dostoevsky out so the stranger can see it. If they ask about him, I can just nonchalantly answer that I just happen to be casually skimming through Dostoevsky in my spare time. Yes, I want that person to think I am just so subtly brilliant while simultaneously the coolest person ever. If I know someone "holy" is coming over, I may leave my Bible open to give the appearance that I was just flipping through the Pentateuch when they stopped by. One time my mom mailed me Anne of Green Gables and a few Roald Dahl books for my Children's Lit class and I purposefully left the books on my bed in an "aimless" fashion so that anyone who poked their head in would see and inquire.

      Does this make me a freak like the people that buy books for show? Probably. But people do it all the time with things other than books. Just think about it. Remember in Pride and Prejudice when Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy surprise the Bennet's on a random afternoon? The girls scramble to hide the ribbons, fluff the cushions, and rearrange the furniture. Who doesn't do that? The in-laws come over and you flip the cushions to hide the coffee stains and dog hair. The neighbor is dropping by for a visit and you throw on some mascara. You've got an important interview and you whip out the "good" suit. The ex-boyfriend might be spotted, so you just happen to put on something saucy with an air of  "Psh. I look this good everyday."

      We all like people to see us in a certain light. Every single person does. If you are denying it right now, then you are just like all the other people denying it.  Sure, this topic has been overdone and hung out to try.  Think High School Musical: You know the world can see us in a way that's different from who we are. But 90% of the time, we do it to ourselves. Heck, if I didn't dress in Anthropologie and use phrases like "Totes Adorbs," the world might catch wind of my obsession with Star Wars. Oops... I guess the world does know now. Too bad.

      Moral of the story? Don't judge a book by its over. Why? Because it may just be a showy, hollow shell. Or, it may be an unconventional cover to a pure gem. Or, it may be exactly what it appears to be. But who are you to decide?

                                                                    Sincerely,
                                                                              Me

Once Every Moon

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Lately I've been reading and exploring a lot of different "professional" blogs. There seems to be an overall element and consistency I have noticed on these blogs that is lacking on mine. On most of them, there is a once of week or once a month STAPLE post. I think I might try that for myself. I'm thinking that once a month I will write a "Stuff of the Month" post. Maybe it will be at the beginning of the month. Maybe in the middle. Maybe just on a random rainy day like today. But I'm goint to try it out and see what happens. I know the things that interest me might not interest my readers but these are hard times for writers, internet or not, and a test run can't hurt, right?

February

• Color. It would be typical and even plain normal for me to pick red/pink/purple for this month. I mean, it is the month of being single in love and those colors are the aura of the emotion. And I guess I sort of am choosing those colors, but in a more chic palette. The last few weeks I've been drooling over the color maroon/burgundy/wine. Shirts, purses, scarfs, jewelry, you name it and if its in those shades, I'll wear it. Sounds shallow, but wearing or even looking at a color that is pleasing to your visual senses can make a huge difference in attitude. If your having a hard time visualizing, here's a sample for ya. Aren't my choices just so much richer than the classic red or pink?

• Book. I hope my book of the month isn't embarrassing. I wish it was something more suited towards the holiday, the gloomy weather, something. But the book I'm currently reading is Swamplania! Yes, the exclamation mark is included in the title...and no, it is not a children's picture book. In fact, it was one of the three finalist books for the 2012 Pulitzer Prize (which in case you didn't hear, was never awarded because none of the three finalists were "exceptional" enough). I wish I could say my February book was something more along the lines of Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights. Instead, I've got alligators and Florida swamps and a motherless/struggling family and a young girl who's last name is Bigtree and works to save them all. It's pretty interesting, I must admit.

• Song. The musical obsession is not a hard one to choose-"Daylight" by Maroon 5 is my prime song of the day and last few weeks. And basically every time I hear it on the radio I scream get really excited, turn the volume to a deafening level and dance.  Yup.  If you see someone looking like an idiot in the car next to you, it is most likely me. It is similar to their old stuff and it's super catchy. 

I'm trying to think of another category....Quote of the month? Movie? Food? I feel that all of that sounds stupid. Really extraordinarily stupid... maybe I'll switch it up each month. Like a surprise present, because we all know that reading my blog is equivalent to openning up a surprise gift...

• Quote. "Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes, courage is the quiet voice at the end of the say saying 'I will try again tomorrow'"- Mary Anne Radmacher.

Well, I guess that's it for the time being. That's the stuff of the month in my small life. But sometimes it is the random stuff that matters, at least it matters to me.

                                                                           Sincerely,
                                                                                   Me

One Poor Sonnet

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      I think Elizabeth Bennet was right on par in regards to the art of poetry. Mr. Darcy, who thought poetry "was the food of love," had it all wrong. Maybe I think that because I am not a poet. Maybe because I don't understand a lot of poetry on my own and have to rely on google for deeper meaning. Regardless, I have never been a "poetry" girl.

      When I was in middle school though, I thought differently. For a few weeks in my english class, we spent time writing different types of poems and compiling them into our own poetry "collections." I saved some of mine because I thought I could put them to good use one day when I was a famous writer. People would read my poems and be inspired to write one of their own. Teachers would use them in class to teach eager poetry-loving students what "real poetry" looks like.

      And here, for your reading pleasure, I am giving you a chance to read one of my poems before I am famous...that's a joke because I know it will never be famous or given any sort of credibility or anything at all for that matter.  It is not great, it is not even good. But it is a testament to my past and the way that I viewed the world when I was a mere thirteen years old.  Please, enjoy.

 

My Place

 

My childhood place.

It shared the hush of town.

 

Girls moved through slowly with concentration,

Trying to understand.

But they couldn't.

 

Here, the world brimmed with possibility.

Here, a girl could dare.

Here, time stopped.

 

It was just right.

It was perfect.

 

But only I knew it.

Only I could feel it.

 

It was empty,

And yet full of life.

It was quiet,

And yet filled with the sound of the birds.

It was still,

And yet the wind moved through like a race.

 

It was my place.

And only I understood it. 

      There it is. One of my very few poems. I think I like the idea of poetry more than the thing itself. I find poems about love to be too stereotyped and melodramatic. Poems about loss too far from the reality of despair. Poems about epic battles too laced with the bias of the writer. Sure, I use fancy words sometimes to describe things, but I don't think a poem can truly provide the inner truth of who I am. I much prefer "real talk" to the highfalutin mumbo jumbo that Gilbert accuses Anne of in the second Green Gables movie. I love in A Knight's Tale when William tries to make up poetry on the spot for Jocelyn and ends up making a fool of himself by saying "Your breasts...they're beneath your throat..." Real eloquent there, bud. Just tell her she's beautiful and that you are completely captivated by her in your own words.

      I am not trying to belittle the art of poetry by any means. Without poetry there would be no literature. Without poetry there would be no Homer, no Dante. I can appreciate poetry for what it is, but I guess since I'm not a poet, I can hardly claim to know it.

                                                                        Sincerely,
                                                                                 Me

Child

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Now that school is officially in full and total swing, I have a little time to catch up with the blog here. Fantastic, right?

      Speaking of "Fantastic," that is one of my words for the New Year. I think I wrote in another post (maybe this one) how I tend to use a few words on a rather frequent basis. Lately, I've found myself saying "Fantastic," "One Thousdand," "Primordial," and a few more that I can't really think of right now. But enough of that.

      This semester, I am taking a Children's Literature class for my minor in education. In that class, we are reading a lot of children's books, naturally. Today I had to do a presentation on an author of my choice; I picked Roald Dahl. If the name doesn't sound familiar, his books should. Among others, he wrote Matilda, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, James and the Giant Peach, The BFG, etc.etc.etc. I just did a whole project on him/his works so I'm not going to go into the specifics. But I DID have to reread the books and for the class I will have to read many other classic children's books.

      I have very vivid memories of when I was little and ventured to the local public library. I remember perusing the shelves and picking the most specific books I wanted to read. I do not spend much time in libraries now; I much more prefer to buy my books so that I can have them forever, even though it takes up a lot of money. I like my bookshelf to grow and create my own personal library. And one day, I hope my library will have a solid selection of children's books for my kids. At home, we still have all the books I was exposed to as a wee little chicken. And obviously, I plan on stealing them all.

      I think it is so incredibly important to read children's books to kids. And to read them to kids. And to even read them as adults. Sure, it is a little mundane to read them after working through Don Quixote and such, but it is a great reminder of the power of imagination and the foundations which every reader started at. Quite frequently, I wish I had more time to reread Anne of Green Gables, Little House on the Prairie, Nancy Drew.  Those books helped shape who I am today, and my biased opinion thinks that I turned out pretty darn swell.

      I know, I know....It is hard to get children to love reading sometimes in today's day and age. The television, the video games, the cellphones, and instant gratification. So maybe more people need to take up Roald's mind set: "So please, oh PLEASE, we beg, we pray, Go throw your TV set away, And in its place you can install, A lovely bookshelf on the wall."

                                                                            Sincerely,
                                                                                      Me

Twelve

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

      Happy 2013! I feel a bit ridiculous as it seems that the last few posts I've given have been Holiday themed... Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and now New Years.  But it is an important time. A time when one cannot help but think. And thinking leads to writing down thoughts, and here we are.

      At midnight, the world began anew. At midnight, calenders were changed. Kisses were given and received. The ball dropped. The song "Auld Lang Syne" was sung, even though no one really understands its meaning. It all centered around midnight.

      Wanna know what else happened at midnight? Cinderella fled the castle, leaving one glass slipper behind. The carriage turned back into a pumpkin, the horses into mice, the gown into rags. Even though the clock struck twelve, her life went back to the way it was before Fairy Godmother bestowed some magic upon the girl. She had to keep cleaning. Had to keep obeying her evil stepmother. The mice still sang and Cinderella still dreamed. This morning when I woke up, I thought of Cinderella.

      New Years Eve is supposed to be filled with hope and promise and fresh beginnings. People can start over. People resolve to be better, to be different. "This year I am going to eat healthier." "This year, I am going to quit smoking." "This year I am going to seriously commit to the person I love." "This year I am going to reconnect with family I haven't spoken to in years." "This year I am going to go to the Superbowl." Etc, Etc, Etc. New Years resolutions are great and all, but what happens when you wake up on January 1st after making such guarantees? Do you really follow through with them, or at least try to for the first few weeks before giving in? Or do you commit, and I mean really commit, to making sure that next New Years Eve you can look back in satisfaction?

      The reason I felt like Cinderalla is simple. With New Years, everything is supposed to change and be better. It is supposed to be the start of the best year yet! But when my alarm went off this morning, I didn't feel any different. I still had the pimple on my forehead from yesterday. I still put on the same bathrobe I've had since I was fourteen years old. I still drank my cup of tea while watching Boy Meets World before hopping in the shower. The New Year didn't ring in a whole new beginning; it rang in a Tuesday morning. I still have to go to work tomorrow. I still have to return to school on Sunday. Life keeps on trudging alone just as it has the last twelve months, and then some.

      Ah! But what of those great promises? What of the extraordinary resolves I made last night before the stroke of midnight?  Enter the Glass Slipper.

      At midnight, Prince Charming found the last remnants of Cinderella's costume. At that moment, he too made a resolution: He would find the girl whose foot fit into the slipper, regardless of how long it took, even if he had to search the whole kingdom. And boy, did he stick to his promise. Prince Charming searched household after household, foot after foot. Imagine, going around and sticking a shoe on every girls foot to see if its a match.... I hate feet so that is one heck of a committment in my eyes.   The point is that he didn't give up.  After a certain number of trial and error, he didn't think "Well I tried. Maybe I'll just make it next years resolution." Because of his persistance, he found the woman of his dreams and together, they lived happily ever after.

      This was probably the silliest analogy I could have come up with, but I genuinely think it works. What happens at midnight will only change your life if you truly dedicate yourself. Yes, life will go on regardless, as mine did this morning. I didn't feel a great shift in the universe at midnight. I felt resolve. I thought "Even though nothing feels different, I will stick to my resolution." And I think that is what matters- Not that your life is going to be dramtically different from here on out, but that you will strive to do whatever your promised amidst the mundane repetition of daily life.
     
      You want to lose twenty pounds? Great! but don't expect it to happen overnight and more importantly, don't give up after a few months.  You want to quit smoking? Don't go cold turkey, it hardly ever works. No matter what your resolution, don't give up because you expected life to be so much more spectacular by just making a promise and sealing it with a kiss when the ball dropped. Rather, make your life spectacular by not giving in to the pressures of "life getting hard or busy or stressful."

      I won't tell you what my New Years resolution is because personally, I kind of consider it like a Birthday Candle Wish. But I will tell you that I know you can do it. I know you can wake up every day and go one with your routines and still fulfill your promises. I know it may sound disappointing that the exhilaration of a new year will wear after a few days.  That like Cinderella, our carriages too will become yellow pumpkins. But Cinderella did the best she could in her circumstance, and when the time came, she knew she had to try on the slipper like every other girl. And guess what reader? It fit.

                                                                       Sincerely,
                                                                                  Me